I met a couple a little while ago. They weren’t particularly attractive – he was a bit short and rather round, she wasn’t exactly a supermodel and came across as a bit menopausal. I adored them, though. They were so in love with each other and worked so well together. They had this little double act going that oozed charm and openness.
Love is a funny thing.
Charm, looks, intelligence, humour – those things don’t create love.
Love creates those things.
It always strikes me when I see a mismatched couple – she good looking, he not so much, or vice versa. Cruelly, we often think that if he’s not so good looking, that he must have a full wallet. But that’s simply not the case. Love can create the extraordinary out of the ordinary.
Being loved fills you with a sense of belonging, of bliss, of meaning. To be loved is one of the greatest joys in this world – you are made to feel worthy, plausible, viable, existent. And it’s that love that pulls all of the gorgeousness out of you – it brings your charm, generosity, life to the fore – making you simply marvellous. Its spreads too – even as your lover revels in your extremely beautiful ‘youness’, so other people notice a magic exuding from your every pore.
It’s contagious too – your happiness, your aliveness awakens those around you and they respond with their own store of charm.
And so the cycle spirals – you are loved and so you become fully engaged and engaging in yourself and the world. You become so much more than you ever imagined.
And the opposite is true, too. Having love withdrawn sucks the life out of you. Everything you imagined good and wonderful about yourself disappears into some black hole inside where it’s really hard to find.
How awful and how wonderful that just a simple declaration of love can bring about a symphony of kaleidoscopically joyful noise from within your soul. How awful that your soul’s song can shut off just as quickly when love goes.
Perhaps a balance – learning to love and cherish yourself will keep that song playing and stop it getting too loud.
Love. It’s a funny thing.